And something goes right in the world… well, wishes do come true and one can manifest things to happen… although not 100%… oh well, take the small victories…
We had a very impressive and wonderful women’s final… with #5 Rybakina ousting #1 Sabalenka in the end, 6-4, 4-6, 6-4… very tight sets and very tight players at different times… zero emotion from one side of the court and SO much emotion from the other side… it is so interesting to see that kind of stark contrast in playing styles… We know the emotions are there, we just don’t see them from Rybakina… Even Pegula commented on trying to get a read in the semifinal and there was nooch… nothing, nada… nicely done… Interesting fact about the match is that they won exactly the same amount of points… kind of fun no? It is always interesting to hear her mention Kazakhstan like she is so fond of the memories that she had growing up there… no… she was born and raised in Moscow… and still lives there… She didn’t get support from the russian federation and therefore when they offered, she accepted… why not, her parents couldn’t afford the money for training… so, a new connection forged… and here we are… She won that first title at Wimbledon when all the russians and belarusians were removed for the actions taken by the country in their onslaught against The Ukraine… anyway… moving on…
In direct contrast to that… #1 Alcaraz takes the win from #4 asshat in GLORIOUS Style… 2-6, 6-2, 6-3, 7-5… I think I almost have a smile… interesting… haven’t felt one of those in a while… ok… it is over… back to it… This match came down to break points and winners to unforced… Alcaraz had +9 and the opponent had -14… Carlos also made more out of the 16 opportunities to break 5 of them… to 2 by the opponent… I will say that asshat was gracious and did make a nice little joke about having to play against 2 players from Spain as Nadal was in attendance… so… haha… and moving on…
For you… I don’t think I have ever wanted someone to knock Kresimir out of the top standing before… maybe once and that was rooting against the asshat in previous times… so… congrats to Kelly for raising her first Trophy… yes, we can hear you through the pine barrens with your celebration… keep it down… some of us are still sleeping… Denise will take second and Kresimir grabs a bronze… On the Women’s side… we are celebrating Dan with his second win and it seems he is following Rybakina’s footsteps… He won Wimbledon last year and now takes the AO… impressive! Eric remains in second place and Kresimir again in third… RECOUNT… RECLIAMING MY TIME!!! no… ok… fine… you all suck and have no personality… right, not true either… where is my corner?
Women’s Draw
Name
Points
Champion
Dan
244
Rybakina
Eric
188
Sabalenka
Kresimir
181
Sabalenka
Kotonias
177
Anisimova
Len
171
Anisimova
Denise
161
Sabalenka
Phirman
159
Anisimova
Kelly
159
Sabalenka
Peter
155
Sabalenka
Men’s Draw
Name
Points
Champion
Kelly
232
Alcaraz
Denise
219
Alcaraz
Kresimir
214
Sinner
Phirman
213
Alcaraz
Peter
209
Sinner
Eric
200
Sinner
Kotonias
199
Alcaraz
Len
193
Sinner
Dan
173
Sinner
And that is about the size of it… We are done… I will chat with most of you in May when the French Open begins… and a reminder that I will be at Wimbledon this year… so, the draw will come out and I will go radio silent until week two… deal with it… BUT the draw will be much more interesting when we go to Paris… well, not literally… Enjoy your Sunday…
holy fucking curmudgeons… I want to throw my computer through a window and most of you know why… why? why? why? sigh… let’s get it over with… although the last match of the semis… it still gets through… ARGH!!! Now, needless to say, it was a full match… and Sinner was less than prepared for this tournament… One only needs to look back at the round of 16 to find a chink in the armor… and now… asshat… one step from 25… and only one person to stop him… #2 Sinner was not enough to take out Djokovic… and please mind you… the Men’s matches were NOT straight forward… at ALL… 3-6, 6-3, 4-6, 6-4, 6-4 and done… ouch… only four hours long and it came down to converting on breakpoints… the stats for winners to unforced is decidedly in favor of the Italian… but with 18 chances and only 2 converted points… that is the name of the game… you have to cross the fucking line Italy… fine… Sinner… penance for you… lots and lots of it… sigh… Alcaraz at least knocked off #3 the wife beater… 6-4, 7-6(5), 6-7(3), 6-7(4), 7-5… I saw some of the highlights and it was some great tennis regardless of the tall lanky idiot on one side of the court… Alcaraz was +20 on the winners to unforced and the other one was +1… so… there you go… Men’s draw set…
For the ladies… this was pretty straight forward… Sabalenka takes out #12 Svitolina 6-2, 6-3… there was an interesting oddity wherein Sabalenka hit the ball with a grunt… stopped the sound and then said something… she was called for a hinderance… and it was… they reviewed it and yeah, don’t talk lady… I still think the grunting is out of control… but alas, I haven’t heard of anything they are doing to curb it any more… maybe at the Junior level? Hopefully… I don’t hear it as much as the older generation… ok… lawd… hardly older… anyway… what is a generation in tennis, like 4 years? LoL!!! anyway… Rybakina took a bit more energy to close out her match up against #6 Pegula 6-3, 7-6(7)… nice solid match from both players winners to unforced is +2 for Rybakina and -5 for the American… so, very thin margins… Rybakina had 6 aces on the match… so, that wasn’t much of the story… and that is where the ball lands theydies and gentlethems…
So, while Kresimir is still leading in the Men’s draw… and Peter is JUST behind… IF Alcaraz lifts the trophy, Kelly will claim the crown… followed by Denise and Phirman… Kotonias who also has Alcaraz to win will land somewhere around sixth… if not, this is the final points and standings… Ladies draw is being led by Dan, who selected this exact final… If Rybakina wins, Dan gains more points and no one else does… IF however, Sabalenka wins… Eric will take the lead and Dan will be in second place… Kresimir doesn’t have enough points to take over Dan… so, second it is and third for Kresimir… don’t overthink it… it just is… phew… what a semifinal for both draws… so many ups and downs… and now… will it be a New AO Champion on both sides with the Alcaraz attempting a career grand slam or will Sabalenka and asshat get another trophy with asshat breaking through to 25… EEK!!!
Men’s Draw
Name
Points
Champion
Kresimir
214
Sinner
Peter
209
Sinner
Kelly
202
Alcaraz
Eric
200
Sinner
Len
193
Sinner
Denise
189
Alcaraz
Phirman
183
Alcaraz
Dan
173
Sinner
Kotonias
169
Alcaraz
Women’s Draw
Name
Points
Champion
Dan
214
Rybakina
Eric
188
Sabalenka
Kresimir
181
Sabalenka
Kotonias
177
Anisimova
Len
171
Anisimova
Denise
161
Sabalenka
Phirman
159
Anisimova
Kelly
159
Sabalenka
Peter
155
Sabalenka
Sheesh… how did this all go by soooooo fast… and solution on the horizon for the draw for the French Open… Hopefully it will be easier… BUT, who knows… maybe not… It should have the ability to select the finalist from the get and it will backfill accordingly… however, it will not be able to take a removal very well… I will send instructions when the time comes… Hopefully those of you who like that feature will be happy… and those of you who don’t know any better will think me a genius… I prefer the latter… Happy Friday kids… Enjoy the tennis…
And good day to all… This one is going to go pretty quickly… I mean… not a lot to really report… But, the QUARTERFINALS!!!
Men… I need a way to explain this… I don’t know how to do it really… but we have 1, 2, 3, 4 to the semifinals… Asshat would have lost last night had it not been for the leg issue from #5 Musetti… 4-6. 3-6, 3-1 RET… do you see my frustration… I mean… we could have had only ONE villain in the end… now we have two… #(&*… Sinner took out #8 Shelton of the USA… 6-3, 6-4, 6-4… I read an article that Shelton is getting closer and closer to them… ummm wouldn’t you need at least a set to claim that? Just asking for a friend… Alcaraz finished off #6 de Minaur of Australia in simple style, 7-5, 6-2, 6-1… I mean, it is Alcaraz… a bit more focused under his new coaching staff… And the wifebeater over #25 Tien 6-3, 6-7 (5), 6-1, 7-6 (3)… see, that is a fight… you can see the effort in the score…
The women… ok, let’s get it out of the way… the racket that shattered the world… break your racket… I don’t care… but… and it is a large BUTT, don’t make commentary that the cameras shouldn’t be there to watch it… You want the money that comes, expect the scrutiny… Don’t apologize… feel it and express it as this is what it looks like to be competitive… We don’t expect perfection, we expect honesty… own it and move forward… Coco… yes, I am talking about Coco… I know there are SEVERAL people in this draw that have had a fit or two over a play in tennis… Not everyone is Rybakina… #3 Gauff takes a very hard loss to Svitolina, 6-1, 6-2… We all still love you Coco… thank you for being human… Sabalenka over #29 Jovic of the USA… 6-3, 6-0… that first set was really fun tennis… well done Jovic… she is 18 and on her way up… speaking of Rybakina… she took out #2 Swiatek in straight sets… not a lot of surprise here… Swiatek is her own worst enemy… she is either all the way there… or just kind of checked out… I don’t think all the losses she suffered in the United Cup didn’t help her focus… 7-5, 6-1… great serving by Rybakina… and deep ball striking… not deeper than Pegula who took out OUR group’s main contender #4 Anisimova… I mean… Pegula toppled Keys… and now she has taken out Anisimova… both VERY heavy hitters… There is something different about the billionaire… I don’t usually watch her, but her serve has more spice to it and her groundstrokes are also heavier and deeper in the court… She took time away from the whiny baby on the other side of the net… I couldn’t believe the amount of pouty face memes we have out of that match from Anisimova… sheesh… you are 24 lady… let’s put on our big girl panties and move it along…
For you.. things are getting very interesting… Kresimir is hanging on to the Men’s draw by a thong string… yes, you heard it first… thong string… followed by Peter who came out of nowhere… well – 1, 2, 3, 4… yes… just saying… and Dan has taken over the lead with the lady draw and Eric is hot on his tail… More twists and turns to come… How far will Rybakina and Sabalenka make it… Dan has Rybakina to win… Will Sinner make the final against Alacraz and who will win? Those are the hot topics of conversation…
Men’s Draw
Name
Points
Champion
Runner-up
Kreismir
194
Sinner
Alcaraz
Peter
189
Sinner
Alcaraz
Kelly
182
Alcaraz
Sinner
Eric
180
Sinner
Alcaraz
Len
173
Sinner
Alcaraz
Denise
169
Alcaraz
Sinner
Phirman
163
Alcaraz
Sinner
Dan
153
Sinner
Alcaraz
Kotonias
149
Alcaraz
Sinner
Women’s Draw
Name
Points
Champion
Runner-up
Dan
174
Rybakina
Sabalenka
Eric
168
Sabalenka
Anisimova
Kresimir
161
Sabalenka
Bencic
Kotonias
157
Anisimova
Sabalenka
Len
151
Anisimova
Sabalenka
Peter
145
Sabalenka
Swiatek
Denise
141
Sabalenka
Anisimova
Kelly
139
Sabalenka
Swiatek
Phirman
139
Anisimova
Sabalenka
Still lots to eat up on the table… worry thee not… look at all the chances… although they definitely dwindle in the next round… because then all the cards are on the table… Good luck… and ENJOY the tennis… well.. I will enjoy the re-play…
G’Day and how ya going? Oh the tennis is definitely heating up… anyone feel it? It is supposed to be upwards of 114 degrees F… that might not be the best day to really play ANYTHING… poor puppies down under…sending their little paws some healing…
Now, on to the tennis… I thought it was going to be a more exciting match… but, the first set was pretty much shit… the second was pretty good and I think we are going to see a lot of our young teenager from Canada, #17 Mboko who takes a loss from Sabalenka… 6-1, 7-6(1)… I was hoping… but, I know there is something special in this young lady… Jovic ousts Putintseva of Kazakhstan via the motherland… actually anyone playing tennis from Kazakhstan is likely russian… so, just stop it… 6-0 (BAGEL), 6-1… bagel and a breadstick… a carb loader dream… Gauff takes out #19 Muchova of Czechia, 6-1, 3-6, 6-3… I didn’t see this match… I should likely go back and watch it… but, I really like Muchova and Gauff… so, what a dream fourth round match up… Svitolina can complete a hat trick if she can beat Gauff and beat Sabalenka… because she beats #8Andreeva… 6-2, 6-4 for the Ukrainian… So happy for her… and she is off and running to the quarters… Pegula… wow… she took it to #9Keys… I mean… took it to her… It was a great match for her… She figured something out… and she kicked her ass… She served great, not a lot of unforced errors and Keys really didn’t know how to solve it… They are good friends and although it is a loss… the now former AO Champion of 2025 is out of the tournament… 6-3, 6-4… Anisimova looked a bit out of sorts in the first set against Wang… but although a tight two set match… the American was too tough for the Chinese player… Wang had played a lot of matches against very hard hitters, Ostapenko and Noskova namely… but adding Anisimova was too much… 7-6(4), 6-4… Rybakina didn’t need much time to take out #21 Mertens, 6-1, 6-3… what’s to say… 32 winners to 14 for Mertens… it was a clean game from the Belgian, just not enough firepower… Swiatek takes out Ingils, the qualifier from Australia 6-0 (BAGEL), 6-3… honestly, I was surprised by the 3 points she got… but… that rounds out the top 8 at AO2026…
Alcaraz over #19 Paul of the United States… I mean… surprised? I hope not, 7-6(6), 6-4, 7-5… I hope you get your truck out of hock… IT DOESN’T GET OLD!!! de Minaur over #10 Bublik (also a russian) from Kazakhstan takes a loss, 6-4, 6-1, 6-1… Zverev over #18 Cerundolo of Argentina… the wife beater was pretty clean in this match, 6-2, 6-4, 6-4… blech… next… Tien… takes out #11 Medvedev… and only one person made that call… wow… (psst… that was the same result as last year)… 6-4, 6-0 (BAGEL), 6-3… OUT of THERE… I LOVE IT! Musetti over #9 Fritz in straight sets… 6-2, 7-5, 6-4… It looked quite one sided… and the score reflects that… I would have loved to be inside that little bible thumping head and just SQUISH!!! oh, hi… just me here… I am selling vacuum cleaners… and they really suck… Why oh why does asshat continually get an easy draw… it isn’t from hereon out… but, really? Martinez (71 in the world), meh… Maestrelli a qualifier… van de Zandschulp in the third… and #16 Mensik withdraws… ARGH!!!! NO JUSTICE!!! Look at his draws for the last 6 slams at least… he has no resistance until the final couple of rounds… I want him OUT OUT OUT… sigh… it’s like LA… #fuckdjokovic… Shelton ousts #12 Ruud in four sets… 3-6, 6-4, 6-3, 6-4… and to round out the men’s draw… Sinner takes care of fellow Italian #22 Darderi in three sets, 6-1, 6-3, 7-6(2)… as the lord intended…
OK… now, we get to you… and I thought it was going to shift and it didn’t COMPLETELY… but ERIC snuck up in the lady draw guessing 8 for 8 picks… Yep, Svitolina and Jovic… what witchcraft is this!?!!? Very nice my friend… well done… Dan has moved to third place… so, we shall see what happens next… Kresimir did get 8 for 8 of the men’s picks to the quarters… yes, even Tien… so SUCK IT LOSERS!!! kidding… only kind of… Len has moved to second and followed by Eric… so, this is going to be fun… right up to the end… where we have Alcaraz or Sinner…
Women’s Draw
Name
Points
Top Half
Bottom Half
Kresimir
151
Sabalenka / Gauff
Anisimova / Bencic
Eric
148
Sabalenka / Gauff
Anisimova / Rybakina
Dan
144
Sabalenka / Andreeva
Pegula / Rybakina
Peter
135
Sabalenka / Gauff
Anisimova / Swiatek
Denise
131
Sabalenka / Gauff
Anisimova / Swiatek
Len
131
Sabalenka / Gauff
Anisimova / Rybakina
Kelly
129
Sabalenka / Gauff
Anisimova / Swiatek
Phirman
129
Sabalenka / Andreeva
Anisimova / Swiatek
Kotonias
127
Sabalenka / Andreeva
Anisimova / Rybakina
Men’s Draw
Name
Points
Top Half
Bottom Half
Kresimir
164
Alcaraz / Tien
Djokovic / Sinner
Len
153
Alcaraz / Auger-Alissime
Musetti / Sinner
Eric
150
Alcaraz / Medvedev
Djokovic / Sinner
Peter
149
Alcaraz / Zverev
Djokovic / Sinner
Phirman
143
Alcaraz / Auger-Alissime
Fritz / Sinner
Kelly
142
Alcaraz / Zverev
Djokovic / Sinner
Denise
139
Alcaraz / Medvedev
Djokovic / Sinner
Kotonias
129
Alcaraz / Medvedev
Nakashima/ Sinner
Dan
123
Alcaraz / Auger-Alissime
Djokovic / Sinner
And that is where we are kids… Enjoy the night… enjoy the tennis… enjoy the heat, far, far away from you… Especially on the East Coast with all that snow…
OMG… I have too much to say… ok… slow down… take a deep breath and… ok… I feel better now… let me see… tasmanian devil… check… crocodile… check… oh, right tennis… Let’s start with the draw full of ladies…
Ok… First match up was Sabalenka who had a battle with Potapova of Austria… was tested and broken… so, that is positive for those of you who have Anisimova or other player to win… the rest of us, squeezing our cheeks for a victory… 7-6(4), 7-6(7)… it was a great match… Mboko takes out #14 Tauson of Denmark… This Canadian has so much ability… she is almost there mentally… I think she is seeing the fruits of her labor, but the natural talent in movement and really seeing the ball… it is really beautiful… Putintseva put it together in the end, but this was a BRUTALLY hard match for her in the win over Sonmez of Turkey (Turkiye)… the fans… this is not a football match… people lose their minds… we are playing tennis… keep your calm until the end of the point… then cheer… why is this something that has to be continually stated… sigh… where is my paddle? Anyway… really nice match and Putintseva gets the win 6-3, 6-7(3), 6-3… Jovic… wtf girl… she grew up… I knew she could… but, whoa… that was a show over #7Paolini of Italy… 6-2, 7-6(3)… I mainly saw the highlights, but lights out putting the Italian in all sorts of uncomfortable positions… really good match for the American… Gauff over Baptiste of the USA in three sets… another very tough competitor in Baptiste who making a third round is a great showing… 3-6, 6-0 (BAGEL), 6-3… Muchova serving up a breadstick duo in her match up against Linette of Poland 6-1, 6-1… mmm I am hungry now… Svitolina takes a win over #23 Shnaider… this makes me SOOOOO happy… Shnaider has been slightly vocal about the Russian propaganda side of the war in the Ukraine… I understand someone inside the country having that perspective… but this bitch gets out… she can read a newspaper and see that it isn’t that way #ukraine #palestine #greenland – fuck these fascists!!! 7-6(4), 6-3… She moves forward to play another russian, Andreeva… Andreeva is a different kind of Russian… devoid of politics and very much into boys boys boys… there was a clip of her playing receptionist before her match… she has a lot of intensity on the court… then we see how young and silly she can be… that was nice… She takes out Ruse of Romania in straight sets, 6-3, 6-4… Pegula over Selekhmeteva pretty quickly… 6-3, 6-2… I didn’t even have time to flip over to the screen as I was watching Keys take out Pliskova 6-3, 6-3… #13 Noskova is out to Wang, 7-5, 6-4… there are all these articles called “The Rise of Noskova,” huh… she has been around for a bit… and now she is gone… so, maybe just a LITTLE too soon… breathe… zen… ok… carry on… Anisimova over Stearns of the USA… she is a fiesty one… big on winning… I mean, they all are… but Stearns looks like a little creepy doll with her blonde hair and blue eyes… so the juxtaposition is HILARIOUS… picture it… Sicily… 1932… oh wait… wrong story… 6-1, 6-4… Rybakina over Valentova of Czechia… 6-2, 6-3… straightforward… makes sense… moving on… Mertens takes out Bartunkova of Czechia, 6-0 (BAGEL), 6-4… I will say Mertens is on a tear… she is so mentally tough… doesn’t make a lot of noise… just sneaks in… Swiatek in a topsy turvy match against #31 Kalinskaya, breadsticks for EVERYONE… 6-1, 1-6, 6-1… these matches confuse me… I can see someone going away at the end… but I feel dizzy… maybe it is my medication… who knows… where is the lid for this bottle? OK… last match… I mean, what is happening… #16 Osaka concedes to Ingis, a qualifier who has benefited the most from other players… But, it is the way the cookie crumbles… She is Australian… so, that is a nice benefit for the next round… but, Osaka does have struggles with mental struggles and I think she is very empathic… I don’t think she did the right thing in the moment of the match, and she is suffering from the worry of how a crowd will react to her after it all fell down… I can sit and type to you about a player has to be tough and go through and do hard things… but, sometimes one just can’t and they need help… I think Naomi made an error in judgement in the moment, I am sure she has reached out to Cirstea and apologized, whether it was accepted is another thing… but that is the type of person Osaka is… and she didn’t want to face the ruckus fans when she was going to play an Aussie player… I am sure she will do better in the future… Just because someone is a person of color doesn’t mean they always have to take the highest road… but, they usually do… Now, on the “fashion” side of things… what was that outfit in the last round?!?! You need to get at least ONE homosexual to say, girl… bukkake… NO! not difficult… I know it was supposed to represent jellyfish… but, it was so distracting… anyway… moving on to the boys… a little less messy… but just a little…
Alcaraz took out #32 Moutet in straight sets, 6-2, 6-4, 6-1… it was entertaining… Moutet is such a character… I feel like he tries to be like Santoro from the 90s and early oughts… but, not as successful… the magician is on the other side of this match… but, you are still cute… and that little butt… Paul over #19 Davidovich Fokina in a retirement, 6-1, 6-1 RET… Maybe Tommy can go and get a new truck now after the last one was repossessed… I know, he already got it back… but, I am not going to forget it… well… dementia is coming… maybe I will… Bublik over Etcheverry of Argentina, 7-6(4, 7-6(5), 6-4… funny story about Bublik… he has the oddest attitude about the sport and verbalizes his thoughts… He told a French publication that if it wasn’t for the money he wouldn’t play tennis… He hates the sport and is only there because it pays and he has some talent in it… I did some research and Ferrer was the same way… He was locked in a closet when he wasn’t playing well by his coach when he was little… SERIOUSLY… that was a different time… anyway… he hates tennis but has the biggest smile when things go well, or not so well… de Minaur over #29 Tiafoe of the US, 6-3, 6-4, 7-5… nothing to see here… moving on… Zverev over #26 Norrie of the UK, 7-5, 4-6, 6-3, 6-1… blech… I want him out… but, who will stop him… hmmm… maybe Cerundolo who takes out #13 Rublev 6-3, 7-6(4), 6-3… let the sands of the hourglass give us the answer… Medvedev needed five sets to get past Marozsan of Hungary… DAMN IT… Kresimir had Marozsan over Medvedev… so, you all are happy now… well those of you who picked the russian… Tien ousts Borges of Portugal 7-6(9), 6-4, 6-2… the youngster has some more to prove after making the quarterfinals last year… he also won the next gen tournament at the end of last year… Musetti over Machac of Czechia… five big sets… 5-7, 6-4, 6-2, 5-7, 6-2… Machac had a victory in a tournament last week… and Musetti lost his… so, here we are… Fritz bests Wawrinka of Switzerland and that ends Wawrinka’s run here in Melbourne forever… 7-6(5), 2-6, 6-4, 6-4… head high Stan… Mensik over Quinn of the USA, 6-2, 7-6(5), 7-6(5)… Asshat over van deZandschulp, 6-3, 6-4, 7-6(4)… Shelton takes out #30Vacherot of Poland… 6-4, 6-4, 7-6(5)… Ruud ends the run of Cilic of Croatia, 6-4, 6-4, 3-6, 7-5… honestly… Ruud is doing better than I would have thought… his last year was abysmal… so… Darderi takes out #15 Khachanov in four sets… 7-6(5), 3-6, 6-3, 6-4… did you notice that on the lady’s draw there are a lot of Americans… in the boy’s draw… so many Italians… speaking of… Sinner takes a win over Spizzirri of the USA 4-6, 6-3, 6-4, 6-4… really odd match… Sinner was cramping at the beginning of the third set… really badly… they closed the roof and got time to replenish and correct the issue… Spizzirri was playing really well and was very fit… the commentators were talking about fitness and the players of yesteryear would just suffer through the situation… Well not everyone signs up to watch a horror show… I think taking care of the players will ensure longevity… but, I will say, I don’t mind the torture of cramping… and one of the commentators stated, no one has died on a main tour event from playing tennis… fair… but, do we need to “suffer” to play the sport? That was a perfect Sex in the City introduction… come on… brilliant…
For you… yes, Kresimir is leading… but that lead is slipping… what was 10-12 is more like 4 (men’s draw)… Dan is second in the lady draw still with Eric now in third… The men have Eric in second in the boy’s draw with Peter just a point back for third… but, everyone is close at hand… so… more points beget more points… Besides the people we have at the top, here are the boys and girls we have selected to the quarterfinals, but they lose there…
Women’s Draw
Name
Points
Quarterfinal and BUST
Kresimir
126
Paolini/Andreeva/ Pegula/Swiatek
Dan
114
Kostyuk/Gauff/ Anisimova/Swiatek
Eric
108
Jovic/Svitolina/ Pegula/Swiatek
Denise
106
Paolini/Andreeva/ Keys/Rybakina
Len
106
Paolini/Andreeva/ Keys/Swiatek
Peter
105
Paolini/Andreeva/ Pegula/Rybakina
Kelly
104
Paolini/Andreeva/ Keys/Rybakina
Phirman
104
Kostyuk/Gauff/ Pegula/Rybakina
Kotonias
102
Paolini/Navarro/ Pegula/Swiatek
Men’s Draw
Name
Points
Quarterfinal and BUST
Kresimir
124
de Minaur/Zverev/ Musetti/Shelton
Eric
120
de Minaur/Zverev/ Fritz/Shelton
Peter
119
de Minaur/Medvedev/ Fritz/Ruud
Phirman
118
de Minaur/Cerundolo/ Djokovic/Shelton
Len
118
de Minaur/Zverev/ Djokovic/Shelton
Kelly
117
Bublik/Medvedev/ Fritz/Shelton
Denise
114
Tiafoe/Zverev/ Fritz/Shelton
Kotonias
109
de Minaur/Rublev/ Fritz/Shelton
Dan
103
Bublik/Rublev/ Tsitsipas/Shelton
That’s about the size of round three of AO2026… moving on to the fourth round to determine who makes the quarters… so much fun… temperature drops to something much more tolerable… 86 for today (tomorrow)… but Tuesday 109… so… that will be fun… at present… the final on Sunday, that high temperature is 72… that is some batshit crazy range… welcome to global warming… have fun storming the castle… MUAH!
Let’s call this year, fun facts about where they are… There were not a HUGE amount of upsets over the last two days… but they are always something to discuss… So, let’s discuss…
For the men on this round of two… #31 Tsitsipas of Greece is out of the tournament to Machac in four sets, 6-4, 3-6, 7-6(5), 7-6(5)… well some of you believed in the little fly… some didn’t (takes a bow)… off you go little fly… Wawrinka is through to the second round… He didn’t have a seed to play, but I still like it… Stan is on his last year of the tennis tour, and he and his ass will be missed… enough said… Cilic takes out #21 Shapovalov of Canada in straight sets, 6-4, 6-3, 6-2… not great for the Canadian, but the former US Open Champion moves through… nice to see him back after many injuries… The usual suspects move through to the third round… and we move on to the Lady Draw…
Hey LADIES!!! Here we go, here we go, here we go, AGAIN… Girls what’s my weakness MEN! Ok, enough of that… I can TLC all over this puppy if needed… STOP Kresimir… please… yes, I hear you… but, now you have that song in your head… You’re welcome… Starts off with a BANG, #28Raducanu of the UK is out to Potapova of Austria?!?! Although I saw this, looks like we have a lot of defectors going on out of the arms of the “bear” and now to a Viennese Waltz… delightful… one, two, three… one, two, three… Selekhmeteva takes a win over #25Badosa… oh, tsitsidosa is soooo passé… 6-4, 6-4… out of here! #24 the complainer (Ostapenko) is also out to X. Wang of China… nice… 4-6, 6-4, 6-4… here it is… the reason you all wanted to hear and celebrate… #10 Bencic of Switzerland is out to Bartunkova, 6-3, 0-6 (BAGL), 6-4… sigh… Yes, that was Kresimir’s wild pick… Bencic had played VERY well in the United Cup beating Swiatek and everyone else she played… seriously… sigh… but, it happens as it happens and chin up and get ready for the next round… There are some interesting matches that happened otherwise… Inglis over Siegemund… Pliskova over Tjen of Indonesia… but what is going on with Osaka? Shows up for Paris fashion week and then is acting bo-bo the fool in her match-up against Cirstea… take the facts for a minute… This is Cirstea’s last year on the tour… she just announced her retirement… It is important to do you best in your final year to get opportunities to play in more tournaments… not rocket science… Apparently, Osaka was pumping herself up in between first and second serves, saying, “come on.” Granted this isn’t likely the only issue, no one wants to lose… Frosty handshake, but the handshake isn’t a “rule” it is not required… but, let it go when you win… be a gracious winner… right Ostapenko?
Anyway… for you… you are NOT going to like this AT ALL… Kresimir is still in the lead… in both draws… and yes, I double checked… just to ensure… Dan is still in second place behind Kresimir for the lady draw and Eric has popped up for second in the boy’s draw… Denise is currently 3rd in the women’s draw and Kelly has moved to third for the men… but, it is still anyone’s game… Remember up above… Bencic is OUT… so all those potential points are now out, think Rybakina / Swiatek… DAMN IT!!!
Bold for the champion, italicized for the runner up… the other two are the selection for making it to the semifinals…
Men’s Draw
Name
Points
Top Half
Bottom Half
Kresimir
94
Alcaraz / Tien
Djokovic / Sinner
Eric
87
Alcaraz / Medvedev
Djokovic / Sinner
Kelly
84
Alcaraz / Zverev
Djokovic / Sinner
Peter
83
Alcaraz / Zverev
Djokovic / Sinner
Phirman
82
Alcaraz / Auger-Alissime
Fritz / Sinner
Len
82
Alcaraz / Auger-Alissime
Musetti / Sinner
Denise
81
Alcaraz / Medvedev
Djokovic / Sinner
Dan
79
Alcaraz / Auger-Alissime
Djokovic / Sinner
Kotonias
79
Alcaraz / Medvedev
Nakashima / Sinner
Women’s Draw
Name
Points
Top Half
Bottom Half
Kresimir
93
Sabalenka / Gauff
Anisimova / Bencic
Dan
81
Sabalenka / Andreeva
Pegula / Rybakina
Denise
79
Sabalenka / Gauff
Anisimova / Swiatek
Peter
78
Sabalenka / Gauff
Anisimova / Swiatek
Kotonias
78
Sabalenka / Andreeva
Anisimova / Rybakina
Kelly
77
Sabalenka / Gauff
Anisimova / Swiatek
Len
76
Sabalenka / Gauff
Anisimova / Rybakina
Eric
75
Sabalenka / Gauff
Anisimova / Rybakina
Phirman
71
Sabalenka / Andreeva
Anisimova / Swiatek
Enjoy the Tennis… Enjoy the snow… for some of you… (Think East Coast) BAM… dreaming of a white weekend… So. Cal looks clear and who knows up here in the PNW… maybe some rain and a prayer…
Welcome back kids!!! We are down under… and while the matches play on in my background, I am going to give you a breakdown of the seeded players who went out in the first round… you know… like I do… although, I am sure there will be some colorful commentary because this has been a WILD ride in three days of the first round… I hope you have your bucket hats on, because you are going to need them…
Let’s start with the boys and well… I have a STINKER of one… Apparently #20Cobolli wasn’t feeling to well and after he dropped the game, he needed to drop some kids off at the pool… poor guy… he ran off the court looking for the loo… EEK! Not a good way to start off the year and subsequently was knocked out by the qualifier Fery, 7-6(1), 6-4, 6-1… Marozsan from Hungary took out #24 Rinderknech of France in four sets, 6-3, 6-4, 6-7 (2), 6-4… RETIREMENT from #7Auger-Aliassime of Canada to Borges… 3-6, 6-4, 6-4… obviously, I don’t like a retirement… I think there were quite that many people out of shape… the heat hasn’t been too terrible, yet… so, I don’t know… very odd honestly… maybe something in the water? #17 Lehecka of Czechia with a loss to Gea… 7-5, 7-6(1), 7-5… not that Lehecka has made very deep runs at the majors… but, he has a great game, sad he can’t put it together to take a couple wins at least… Get out… #23 Griekspoor of the Nederlands has not been playing well as of late… Maybe he will put it together when the clay court kicks back in… and maybe not… a loss to Quinn in straight sets, 6-2, 6-3, 6-2… and out you go… #27 Nakashima of the USA is down and out to van de Zandschulp in four sets, 6-3, 4-6, 7-6(1), 7-6(3)… it was a bit of a battle, but in the end, the Dutchman was too much for the American… (sorry James K, fun pick though!)… #28 Fonseca of Brazil is done for the AO… what is the hype with him… it seems it is mainly based on potential… I got bored with as many mistakes he was making on very elemental shots… His loss to Spizzirri wasn’t any surprise to me after watching this match… I think this boy needs to check in his ego for a couple of minutes, maybe shine up some shots and try again next year… 6-4, 2-6, 6-1, 6-2…
OH Ladies… #11 Alexandrova is ousted by Sonmez 7-5, 4-6, 6-4… Jacquemot knocks out #20 Kostyuk of the Ukraine… very tight match but… enough is enough… 6-7(4), 7-6(4), 7-6(7)… remember at the majors there is a 10 point tie-breaker in the deciding set if they reach 6-6… NOW, did you see the VERY creepy stalker lady in the stands… front row? OMG… sooooooo odd… She had a lovely sparkly sign that said something like “GO Kostyuk,” very generic… but, Kostyuk has on a very cute outfit… pastel pink with white lines that mimic the lines of the court… She was wearing a dark version of the same style at the US Open… but the woman in the stands was wearing the SAME OUTFIT!!! I don’t know… that takes it to a new level… mouth agape and praying for a miracle that she is still alive… #32 Vondrousova withdrew at the last minute and was replaced by Lucky Loser Townsend who faced Baptiste of the USA… Great match… so much desire to do well… Baptiste takes the match 6-3, 6-7(3), 6-3… #15 Navarro of the USA (billionaire) loses her first round match to Linette 3-6, 6-3, 6-3… tee hee hee… ok, I know… most of these people come from money… so… I should put a sock in it… but… this is next level… so… I will put a sock in you… how about them apples… Not a HUGE shock, but #26 Yastremska is out to Ruse… The Ukrainian has only beat Ruse once out of five meetings… so a 6-4, 7-5 result is par for this course… Tjen takes out #22 Fernandez of Canada… very tight second set, but Tjen is an up and coming player… (nicely called Dan and Kresimir) we see her… 6-3, 7-6(1)… Fun match, in case you missed it… Sloane Stephens v. Karolina Pliskova… they have both been out for foot injuries and surgeries… and here they are at AO26 facing each other… 7-6(7), 6-2 was the end score and although Stephens has a winning record over Pliskova, this time the Czech player got the “W” – not too bad for a couple of old ladies in their early thirties… wait… what does that make me?!!?!? Yes, I heard you… Another interesting match was Keys v Oliynykova… the Ukrainian player was having the BEST TIME out on the court… she has face tattoos and a neck tattoo… she is very interesting to look at and she had a very unorthodox game… lots of lobs and moon balls… it was HILARIOUS!!! Keys was fighting to stay in the first set… and finally took it 7-6(6), 6-1… A very fun watch and she stayed on the Court signing autographs and enjoying the moment… I am all for it!!! Keys was very kind clapping for her and letting her take the moment… I mean Keys was giving her winner speech and she was just signing autographs… #27Kenin (the velociraptor…) stomping around after every point is OUT… she takes a loss from compatriot Sterns 6-3, 6-2… Kenin is still a shock winner over Muguruza… she won… but, totally a win out of left field… #30 Joint of Australia is out to an 18 year old Valentova in 6-4 x 2… I was sure I was familiar with the name and there it was 2024 junior champ in singles and doubles at Roland Garros… So, look for more from her… #18 Samsonova takes a loss to chaos demon, Siegemund who loses the first set in a bagel and then storms back for a win… 0-6 (BAGEL), 7-5, 6-4… ouch…
Everyone else stayed the course but we are entering round 2 and you know more is bound to come… the heat is expected to rise and be VERY hot on Saturday…
For YOU!!! OMG… I know you have been waiting… THREE LONG DAYS… just to see what the other idiots in the draw picked… Per usual, Kresimir is leading in both… but, as you also know… he will fall like a sack of potatoes in the 1850s… if you know, you know… Dan follows Kresimir in the Lady draw and Kelly is second in the Men’s draw… so… nicely done… don’t look behind you… it might be a bear… because those bitches are breathing on your neck… good luck…
Men’s Draw
Name
Points
Champion
Runner-up
Kresimir
50
Sinner
Alcaraz
Kelly
42
Alcaraz
Sinner
Eric
41
Sinner
Alcaraz
Peter
41
Sinner
Alcaraz
Dan
41
Sinner
Alcaraz
Phirman
40
Alcaraz
Sinner
Len
40
Sinner
Alcaraz
Denise
39
Alcaraz
Sinner
Kotonias
39
Alcaraz
Sinner
Women’s Draw
Name
Points
Champion
Runner-up
Kresimir
47
Sabalenka
Bencic
Dan
43
Rybakina
Sabalenka
Denise
41
Sabalenka
Anisimova
Peter
40
Sabalenka
Swiatek
Kotonias
40
Anisimova
Sabalenka
Len
40
Anisimova
Sabalenka
Kelly
39
Sabalenka
Swiatek
Eric
37
Sabalenka
Anisimova
Phirman
35
Anisimova
Sabalenka
Round one is in the books… congrats!!! I hope you are all well and enjoying the matches… It always goes sooo quickly… Appreciate you all! Have a great and amazing evening!
DOUBLE-UP BAGEL 